When you know yourself, you are empowered. When you accept yourself, you are invincible. You don’t need love from outside factors to make you happy when you love yourself. Believing in yourself is absolutely crucial in achieving happiness. You don’t need constant reassurance to make yourself feel worthy when you know who you are, and love that. So why is it so hard for us to just BELIEVE in ourselves? Why can’t we just stop comparing ourselves to others for 5 seconds to just BELIEVE THAT WE ARE AMAZING. Do you know how much time you waste looking at other peoples’ lives and comparing yours to theirs? Way too much. Believing in yourself is everything.

DID YOU KNOW? A high self-esteem acts like a high functioning emotional immune system. When our self-esteem is high, stress and anxiety takes less of a toll on our bodies. We are stronger in the face of rejections and failures and we recover from them more quickly. Our self-esteem functions like an emotional immune system that protects us from emotional and psychological pain. Obviously we should be doing everything we can to protect and boost our self-esteem, not only because it allows us to walk around with confidence, but because the day-to-day hardships, such as failure, aren’t as hard as they used to be. Check out this diagram from The Self Esteem Book.

self esteem book
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The majority of damage to self-esteem is self inflicted. This shouldn’t come as a shock. We often respond to rejections and failures by looking at ourselves and blaming our short-comings and creating reasons why you deserved that rejection. We tell ourselves we aren’t good enough, or we come up with reasons for why we don’t deserve happiness. We use STUPID and UNTRUE statements to justify damaging our self-esteem when we need to build it up the most. These statements include “I deserve it”, “I knew it was too good to be true”, “I should have known this would happen”, or “God, I hate myself!”. Next time you catch yourself saying something negative about yourself just think, what is this doing to BETTER your life? What positive impact does having low self-esteem have on your life? The answer is NOTHING.

You can not have self-esteem without SELF LOVE. You want to feel confident? LOVE YOURSELF. You want to be happy? LOVE YOURSELF. Do you want to achieve your goals and accomplish all of your wildest dreams? BELIEVE THAT YOU CAN AND LOVE YOURSELF. Have you ever heard someone you love talk down to themselves and you just sit there like why does this beautiful person not see what I see? You don’t want to hear your best friend and loved ones hate themselves. So why do you get to do it? What can you possibly lose from loving yourself? Nothing. What can you gain from loving yourself? Absolutely everything.

10 ways to improve your self-esteem and body image

  1. DON’T focus on what other people’s bodies look like.
  2. DO focus on the things you like about yourself.
  3. Say ONE THING that you like about yourself each morning.
  4. Write down the ACCOMPLISHMENTS that have to do with who you are, not what you look like. 
  5. UNDERSTAND that what we see on TV or in magazines have been altered, and do not strive to look like this. It is unattainable because it is NOT REAL.
  6. Do not look for VALIDATION anywhere else but within yourself.
  7. EMBRACE your flaws. Perfection does not exist, so love the things that make you unique.
  8. Surround yourself with people who SUPPORT you and make you happy.
  9. Find your PASSION and live for it.
  10. ACCEPT that you will make mistakes, you are human. You will learn from your mistakes and they will make you STRONG.


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